I want to sleep with you, in the most innocent sense of the phrase. I don’t know, I guess something about being able to synchronize our breathing to our own heartbeats really attracts me to the idea. I’d love to fall asleep to the sound of your voice and the smell of your hair. If I had my way, we’d cuddle and tell each other childhood stories before finally falling into a silent bliss. I want to sleep with you because I want to see if you snore, and if you do, I’ll tease you about it for the rest of our lives together. I want to be able to wake you up with a dozen kisses, just to stare into your eyes and silently communicate to you just how much I love you, because I just can’t find the words. Look forward to waking up to the smell of pancakes and pure sunshine, but don’t go anywhere. Yes that’s right, I’m cooking you breakfast in bed.
It’s so fun being a single mum when you have no kids and you’re still a virgin
- Period cramps
- Sore tits
- Mood swings
- Picking out outfits for the day
- Styling hair after showering
- Having a hard time running cause of your tits
- Making sure you don’t get pregnant
- Carrying the baby
- Being called a bitch, whore, hoe for no apparent reason
- Make sure you don’t get raped
- Having pedophiles hit on you
- Oh, and fancying the fuck out of someone that doesn’t know you exist on the earth.